Monday, November 26, 2007


It feels like I have a Monday test and I don't care about it so I won't study but stare at the open book for another two hours. But it's not 1999 and there have been no tests since December 2005. But, procrastination is back, which means I must be bored of my current lifestyle, yet again. I just got over with the whole, let's get proactive and make serious changes in life process, and the next one was not due for another three-four months. But damn. I have pending scripts to write, which I think I will manage by 11 am, no issue, but its 1:17 am and I should write them, rather than write this useless post, but I am just too bored and there are no new fun applications to add on facebook.

I just realised the fun years of my life are behind me now. The whole no responsibility-party till you die years have stretched on, but now it seems it has to stop for the sake of maturity. It made sense to be 19 and to just live from saturday to wednesday to saturday to wednesday and so on. It was brilliant and I had a great time, knowing well that all my freedom comes at a price and so I will always be responsible in my own inane spoilt way which makes no sense, but still does. My closest friends moved out of town in the last year or so with the last one leaving last weekend. The old haunts don't feel the same anymore and yes I am suffering from painful nostalgia and very soon people will stop inviting me out, which is fine, but what am I to do with my brilliant existence. I just changed jobs, and I enjoy it, but boredom is setting in. Maybe I need to leave the city too, but for what. I hate taking decisions, I let destiny make them for me and right now everything is flowing smoothly.

Everyone is experiencing extremes, someone is job hunting, someone is passing out, someone is falling in love, someone is trying to get back, someone is secretly holding hands, someone is fighting, someone is crying, someone has an eating disorder, someone is studying for a dream, someone is sipping coffee, and I am just watching.

I am none of them. I am typing.


I am typing out a goddamn lame post here.

And I don't even know what it is that I am feeling to put in words.

Ok after ten minutes, I know.

I want to experience the extremes too.